Salvation

I thank God that I'm saved and my friends should thank God as well. If it had not been for the Lord, I would be the wenchiest wench (or a Double W as coined by Tiff) that you would ever know. In addition to being a mean person, I had a foul mouth. Now to some, that may have been entertaining but to me it was exhausting. I was a mean person and never denied it. And as most know misery loves company. But I don't think Misery is as popular as people would think. Misery might love company, but who wants really wants to be around her?

As a Christian I cut out the foul mouth, but I have still have a weapon. An arsenal as a matter of fact. I tend to be right about most things. No really its true. It seems that I must let people know that too. At the time I think I'm doing them a favor. Don't you want to know whats right? In the end, I get satisfaction from knowing I was right. What does that make me? Self- righteous? Ewwww. That is not sexy.

I'm skimming through this book I picked up in the library. The Power of Purpose: Living well by doing good. Just by the title I know its gotta be Biblical. And it is, but not overtly. The way of the world is to take Biblical principals, yet don't give God the credit. Anyway, the part that caught my attention is a chapter called Winning the War. "The feeling of power that comes from making a clever, cutting remark or proving yourself smarter than someone else is a petty victory." Ouch. I felt that.

I've been praying about being judgmental because clearly I can be. I don't want to be right with the risk of pushing others away. And I have learned it doesn't really matter if you were right or not, people do what they want anyway. There's really no need it making them feel small after they realize they've made a bad decision. What if you were just supportive in the end once they've finally come to themselves? They wouldn't resent you for looking down at them, but thank you for being there.

Erykah Badu said in a magazine,"Being humble is so 2007." Humility may be out of style, but its definitely a necessity.

how's it goin?

So how's the new place? How you like the apartment? All questions I've been asked. I mean there's not too much there. It's quiet and I mean that in a good way. I can't wait until I get some furniture. I've been asked what I need. Y'all know I love lists so I told em. I've never lived alone before. It's very strange. I feel like its something that I need to do. Maybe I'm not as independent as I thought. Then I started to think, is this the way it will be forever? I'm jumping the gun, I know. And I've only been there a couple weeks. So now its furniture time.

I'm tired of sleeping on the floor. Its too hard to get outta bed when bed is on the floor. Its like climbing upward which takes more energy than swinging your legs over. You're already halfway standing up. Furniture is coming in two days.

Plus, I've had all this crap going on with my phone. Haven't been able to call anyone. Great introspective time. Now I'm ready for my phone back. I'm just wondering what my voicemail has on it. Can't wait to listen to messages from a month ago.... and erase them.

My niece wrote me a letter. She's only 3, so it was one SHE had to read to ME. It said, "Kita Come home, I love you." Then a couple hours later it said, "Kita Stay with me, I love you very much. " Touched me wayyy deep in my heart. I love my baby, but I gotta grow up and I HAD to get out.

Speaking of growing up......HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!!!!!