What did you say?

So I just finished reading a blog AND almost all the comments from the Very Smart Brothas blog called Why Compliments are a Man's Kryptonite and it made me take a long look at myself. (Warning there is language). Well, I can remember telling my girl Tiff that I just don't give men compliments because I don't like to blow up their heads. They become all conceited and you can't tell them anything and in turn you get treated like trash because they think they're so much better than you. She lectured me about this and told me I gotta do better. Then when a guy I liked came over to our apt I remember mumbling "I like your shoes." His face lit up. I looked at Tiff like 'Are you happy now?'

While I can say this is probably still true. I don't see myself being a overt compliment giver... to men. And just like the blog states women fawn all over each right when we see each other. I almost feel it is a compulsion to give my friends compliments and I feel bad if I can't find something. But for men. Well I don't want them getting the wrong idea and also as perpetuated by the blog, my theory is correct. So I think I'll keep my deck stacked and play my cards right. However, if I ever want to make a man putty in my hands, I now know how to do it.

And I have heard that is the trick of the game from older married women. Make sure you stroke a mans ego from time to time. You're so strong! I could never do that! You're so smart! How did you figure that out? You smell wonderful! What cologne is that? But be careful with your arsenal ladies. You can end up attracting attention you can't get rid of.

And in the same token, don't think just because I compliment you don't think its because I want you (men). I want to become better at exhortation. It's never been my thing. But I don't want it to be misinterpreted as flirting. So we'll just see how this turns out.