Aw shucks!

The diva's got hi-speed internet! Now I can't be stopped!!!!! Yeah, let's just see how much time I have to put some thoughts into my blogs. Then Cole can become a fan again.

It's crazy yo!

I've been on a mad long hiatus. I know, I know you missed me. Those of you who still check in on me. Part of the reason is I still have a crappy computer. Partly because I don't have time and finally partly because my mind has been on hiatus. But to update, life is moving. I don't feel stagnate at all. I feel like I am going somewhere and I'm focused.

There are many issues that my friends and I talk about daily. Mainly God and relationships. God is my number one. I mean I have experienced a level with God that I have never been in. I was listening to my friend and she was like, "I would have never thought I'd be this involved in church a year ago. When I started goin to church I made the commitment that I would go EVERY Sunday and maybe some Wednesdays. You know, I was gonna be a great mediocre Christian." And its funny now because we are at church at least 3 times a week. AT LEAST. And we love it!

And people get so caught up in being mediocre Christians because they don't feel like they need to be involved. Like thats only for some people. No! It's vital to living everyday. I ain't mean to come back on here and start preaching. But that's whatsup. God is so many things. So many things! I have realized what is really, really important to me.

So yes, this week we have the Encounter coming up and I'm really excited. It's never what you expect. I love suprises!

I'm starting to draw again, write again. In a couple weeks I be starting this Art program at my church, drawing and singing. Just digging into my gifts and not sitting on them.

Praying about this training program in the summer. It's to be a buyer for a company. That would be the hottest job and I'm perfect for it! So if God gives me the thumbs up to go. I'm out! I pray that I'm prepared to go (mentally, spiritually, and professionally) and that I am able to find a church.

I got many more opinions to share. More thoughts to give. More love to post. But this is my first entry in.....forever. So hopefully I won't stay away too long again.

Its like you don't even realize

so yeah I've been so out of it lately that I didn't even realize how boomin my social life has been.

And I mean doing things that have nothing to do with work or church. Saw a lotta great movies: Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants (don't sleep on it), Mission Impossible 3, Lucky Number Slevin, and that Narnia movie (great movie). Plus I got to see that movie The Holiday with Cameron Diaz and Kate Winslet. It was sooo good.

We got like a 11 inches of snow last week. Yes here in Oklahoma. It was crazy. I got snowed in at Cole's for a couple days. Then when we dug her mom out, they dug me out too. My neighbor made an 8 foot tall snowman.

Oh yeah I played this game with my sister and her friends called Imagine If. Interesting game. You write people down on this board then roll the dice to see who you'll land on. They give scenarios for you to put those people in and then all the players guess what they would do in that situation. The most popular answer wins. So even if you its you, you can't think about what you would do in that situation. You have to think about what everyone ELSE thinks you would do in that situation.

It's so good just to spend time with friends. Even if its just a couple hours at a time because usually thats all I have to give.

I got the next couple days off and I'm trying to see if I can get Saturday off too. I gotta be somewhere else and I paid money to be there. I just forgot to request off....Eh hopefully it will work out.

ok....

So we had a guest speaker at church yesterday. Her word was definitely on time. I'm still trying to digest it as I write. Work has got me so out of it that its hard to concentrate on anything else. But what she preached was that the struggle we have with God is between our desires and will against God's desires and will. There's only one winner and guess what? It ain't you. I mean you can get what you want and you can do what you want. But what you'll find out is its temporary happiness and most of the time its not really what you wanted anyway.

This is the reason I don't write so much anymore, its so hard to put this into words.

I want to explain what's going on in my life without it being confusing or deterring people away from God.

Truth is, its really hard living this life. Like really hard. But ain't nothing else out there. Every single day is a fight.

I guess my problem is that I thought I was further along in my walk than I actually am. And I have all the tools to go further but am I willing to sacrifice everything? And after the Encounter God showed me some things that I'm still struggling with. That is what is hindering me. The stuff that I'm struggling with and don't want to let go of.

In church, she said its always the stuff you love that you don't wanna let go of. Which do I love more? My stuff or God? Should be an easy answer right? Not so much. Clearly my actions are showing differently.

Christ's principles are so oxymoronish (i know that's not a word). I mean to gain ever lasting life, you give up your life to serve others. That's hard! We look at people all over the world who are giving up everything to focus on God and I can't give up TV for a week. I mean I can but I don't want to. And people make it sound so easy.

Perhaps its that I can't see the reward. But even if God showed me my reward, I probably still wouldn't be able to do what I need to do. Only until I am ready to risk it all will I be able to sacrifice for real.

I have to end with this: it's not easy, but its WORTH it. Because I don't feel like I'm dying inside. And the peace....I mean really not having to worry at all, its like nothing else.

Sometimes I just wanna shut everyone out and get to business. ME AND YOU GOD THAT'S IT. But that's not realistic. Plus I don't wanna spend my life alone. And God is not asking me to. Just enough time for Him to give me what I need, so that I don't feel like its so hard.

This is REAL!

I should never doubt that God hears me, but I do. Yesterday at church was just evidence that He definitely does hear me. And trust me, if He hears me He hears you too. My Nicole and I were just talking about our current status. We felt like the fire was gone out our walk with God. It felt like I couldn't go back to what I used to do but how do I go forward. It was really frustrating to the point where I just wanted to be like forget it.

I didn't want to go to church yesterday. I'd had a bad night altogether. I get really cranky when I don't get sleep. I have to pray about my husband because if I sleep near someone who snores I start thinking violent thoughts. I have never acted on them, but I do think them. Anyway, I was way sluggish, didn't wanna go. My friends and I sat way in the back being cynical about everything. Then my Bishop began his sermon. "Have you ever needed a 'right now' miracle?" Yes, I need one now. I'm paraphrasing here but he was basically talking about how we are so used to 'waiting for our miracle' that sometimes we need to get down right demanding and say, 'God I need my miracle now!'.

There are times in the Bible where people said to God, I really need you to show up now. And their faith is so in it that He does. Its a desperate time. I'm tired of being stuck in the middele. A new year is coming and we only have 44 days until the end of this one. He wrapped it up by saying we need to pray God's plan. Whatever he promised you is what you pray. Well if you say 'God has never spoken to me', sit and think for awhile, it will come to you. Sometimes He speaks through others. We really have to take the time and listen. Life gets way too busy. I'm taking the time to listen to God.

Where to begin?

So this is sort of a continuation of what I was talking about in the last post. It's not exactly but its in the same stream of consciousness for me. Cole and I were talking and I am glad to see I am not alone in my thoughts. She is my fraternal twin after all. Now what we were talking about is basically what my last blog is about. Where are the MEN? Why are we having to push men into responsibility? They are the head of the household. Why aren't they taking charge? Although from a biblical standpoint women are supposed to birth the vision, but what if the man has no vision? That's why its important for a man to have a relationship with God. God will give him the vision. Women support the vision. Haha! Now I understand why cheerleaders are women. We're always the ones saying you can do it or go for it.

Anyway, I just wanna talk to some men and ask why they are shrinking from repsonsibility. Even from the very first approach. You find a lot more women are making the first move and that has NEVER been me. And this is what's so messed up: the ones that are clear about what they want and where they are going, we don't want them. Perhaps their vision needs to get a bit clearer?

Which somehow brought me here. I want a relationship with God, but I've been seriously slacking. I haven't been reading my Bible or praying like I should. But its getting too routine and that's not a relationship. That's obligation. That's not what God wants. I've been thinking and thinking about this. How do I get past this to the deeper stuff? I've been putting crap before God and expecting Him to take it. And even though I know this, what am I doing to get there? What is hindering me?

This is what I found. My desires. I still want to be seen as a sex object. I be wanting to do those Pussycat Doll Beyonce Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader moves. I love to party. I just wanna get drunk sometimes. But I don't. Why? Because I know its stupid. It doesn't lead to anything but destruction. This is what the Bible says. A man is dragged away and enticed by his own desires (James 1:14). So we have to inspect our desires. Even when they seem to be godly desires, are they really? And why do I still desire do these other things? Those who have their mind on the Spirit want what the Spirit desires.

No doubt God has done some amazing things in the last 11 months. But to get to that next level I feel like I'm gonna have to do something else. Its going to have to be a Spiritual breaking. And its gonna hurt. But like any other bootcamp, where's the drill sergeant? Where's my made coach? Cus clearly if I'm depending on just me it ain't gone happen. I'm beleiving God is going to send someone. Just like this last Sunday I was not gonna go to church. I had a meeting at work that morning and I had to go back to work later. I was just like forget it, I can miss one day. Well, then I get a phonecall from one of my co-workers asking if she can ride with me. That's accountability there. So I went. But I don't want to get into the routine. Me and God still have some talking to do.

A lil movie analysis

What looks stupid to everyone else, might actually be genius. So I was watching Love and Basketball today and I got a lil more in depth. The first thing I noticed was that when Omar Epps broke up with Sanaa in college, she took all the blame even though he was being stupidly selfish. She even said, "Whatever I did, we can fix it."
Me, I woulda been like,"Oh so that's it for us? Aight, I'll holla at you." And even though she was on the verge of begging he still broke up with her.

When we cut to the final scene and they're playing one on one for his heart. She looks really desperate. She is desperate. And I'm thinking what about your pride? What about being an independent woman of the millenium? What if she had never even tried to get him back. He would have ended up married to Tyra and divorced in a couple years. Sanaa woulda been working at the bank, going from job to job, probably single for a couple years or forever.

Although she looked stupid on the outside and it seemed she was losing faith by the end, she had to be mad confident to do it. She knew he was making a mistake. She knew he was for her. What could have been going through his head? Could he not see that they were meant to be? Had he given up?

Men move on so fast to anything new, whether its good for them or not. Seems like you have to hit them over the head to get them to see what you see. And I love the song at the end, "You make a fool of me." Cus it looks like that. But it also reminds me of a song by Sade "Love is stronger than pride".

I mean thats not the end of analysis. I still gotta connect it with the Lord and trust me I see connections. Women birth out the man's vision, thats why we have the womb. But we're not supposed to take things into our own hands that's how Sarah got into that mess with Hagar. Sometimes you feel helpless when it comes to things in life. That's when you have to trust God has a plan and be confident when it comes time for you to do your part, you'll be ready.

Will this hold you over?

Not to tease y'all, I just felt obligated to write a lil something since I've been on the internet for so long today. I've caught up on my facebook, myspace, back account and everyone else's blog. I feel like I've missed out on so much. People have gotten into relationships, broken up, into new organizations, quit jobs. Where have I been? Work. Yeah, I'm not about let this take over my life. It's time to regain control. Basically that's where I'm at right now.

I didn't even think I would be able to form a complete sentence let alone write a whole blog. I just wanna let y'all know I miss you. Yes I do. I don't have the energy it would take to catch up with everyone so I just haven't done it. I am exhausted. That's all I have to give.

In continuation

So yeah after my shift yesterday, my boss had a lil talk with me. My numbers are not where they are supposed to be. She was asking me to question if this is the position I should be in during holiday time or should I step down and wait till things slow down and learn how to do things in the spring. I was like uh, I know things haven't been great the past couple days but I CAN do this and I WILL.

Basically, she gonna be watching me for awhile until my numbers come up. I think it may be my non-chalant nature. Lots of people take it as I don't care when its just that I don't care to perform or stress out for anyone. However, I do understand that some people need to be inspired and that energy is contagious so I will try to be more enthusiastic at work.

This morning we had our meeting and she was pleasantly surprised by our numbers and I think mine in particular. She was like "Oh!" And I wanted to be like OOOH IN YOUR FACE!!

But I maintained.

And it wouldn't be Christ- like.

Yeah this week has been off to a bad start, but I take authority over the enemy. I think I'll be meditating on Luke 10:19 today.

In preparation

I would have to describe this last week a roller coaster ride. I've had a really great time followed by a couple bad days. The women's encounter was last weekend and while I had a great time, I don't think my body had a chance to catch up. It went like this. Friday: woke up and had to be a work at 6am. I was probably late. Worked till 3pm then me and Cole went to Wal-Mart her house then church til bout 10. Went to my house to pick up some clothes, Taco Bell, back to Cole's. Saturday: Went to church at 8am till 10pm, talked until bout 11:30, went home. Sunday: overslept, contemplated not going to church at all since I had to be at work at 12.

Now this is where I have to stop. I knew I had to go to praise and worship for some reason. So even though I was late for the last session of the encounter I was early for praise and worship. I had the most exciting, outrageous praise and worship experience I've ever had. Like, it took over most of church. See God let me know the authority I have over the enemy in that time. He showed me what he was about to do. And it just spread throughout the church.

When it was time for me to leave for work. I was still crying and praising in the car. I was just hoping I would be able to get it together before I got there. But on the way, the Holy Spirit warned me that this would not be a good day. The devil comes quickly to steal a word, kill your joy and destroy your promise. It was a crazy day plus I was mad tired. Monday, just the same, bad day and I was mad tired and added onto that I felt sick.

Now looking back, I have to ask myself: Did I take the authority that God had just let me know I HAVE over the enemy? Apparently not. But at the end of this whole drama God will get the glory. We're about to turn this thing around. There you have it.

In it

Tonight is the season finale of Project Runway. Oh how long have I waited for this. I love that Bravo shows it several times in the same night because I always miss it on Wednesdays. I wish Top Model did that. I may get to see it this Sunday. I've been trying to get the recorder working on my vcr/dvd player. I don't know what it's doing. It's recording stuff that I never wanted to watch and like, hours of it.

Well, my fave to win is Micheal. I just like his style. On side note: is it just me or wouldn't Kayne be super sexy if he wasn't gay? I saw him on the reunion show with his lil stubble. I just loved it. Daggone shame I tell you!

I'm feenin for a Rubicon potato and if I have anything to do with it I'm gettin one! Y'all non-Tulsan's don't know nothing bout that. It's this huge potato with smoked BBQ meat, BBQ sauce, ranch and cheese! Oh its so good! Me and Larry used to make our own in Hampton and like eat em on the low because we ain't wanna share the secret.

Speaking of Tulsa I saw the episode where Oprah and Gayle were in Tulsa and crashed those two weddings. It was so crazy. Actually a friend of mine from high school was at one of the weddings. So wierd.

Do you know how hard it is to manage your money when you have none? It's on the way though. The money, the car, my blessing. Ohhh its on THE way!

Randomness: I just think its so funny how on Dave Chappelle, when he's doin the Lil' Jon skit and he says WHAT?! The people always repeat themselves so patiently back to him. They never get tired of it and yell back. I think that therein lies the genius of the whole thing.

It took me a minute to formulate an entire blog in my head. I got one. So it looks like I won't be going to Hampton's Homecoming this year. I am kinda bummed. Even if I had the money to go (which I don't), I still wouldn't be able to take the time off. It's a blackout week at work. In fact I can't request off until next year. Since I got my promotion, the position does not allow us to take that time off. So I won't be seeing my Hampton people unless they come visit me.

When I found out I wouldn't be able to go this memory came back to my mind. Last year when I was in Hampton there was an older lady and she told me, When you leave you'll come back for homecoming, but not the first year after. I tried to make it happen. In the end it wasn't meant to be.

My phone is sorta on a break til Friday. The first week I guess they were giving me a chance because I could recieve calls, but not make them. Which I guess was kinda cool. Now I can't do anything. It'll be paid on Friday.

I'm so proud of my mom, she's getting the motivation to take some accounting classes. Which I've said she should do for years. She's a financial genius. The only reason we've ever made it through the years other than God.

Excited about doing more at work. I'm realizing there's a lot more involved in this position than just going to work. I'm going to have to actually study.

Set the atmosphere

I got a real lesson yesterday. So I thought my day was going well. While my sister went to get her brakes fixed, I was watching my neice. She said it'd only take about 30 mins, so I figured I'd have more than enough time. I got dressed and when I called to check on the progress she said she was on her way. I called about 30 mins before my shift because it only takes about 10 mins(when I drive)- 15mins for someone else to get to my job. Then she calls back 15 mins later and said my aunt is gonna take me to work. I started to get nervous cus my aunt is slow as molasses and she's habitually late. There's no telling when she was gonna get there.

Well she got there but in my rush of tryin to get out of the house I forgot my keys for the store. So we had to turn around and go back to the house. I was extra frustrated. All kindsa stuff rushed to my head. This looks bad. My first day on the floor as manager and I'm late. All these things on my mind rushed to the forefront and I got so focused that I think I looked like I was about to pop a blood vessel. Then my aunt said,"What you over there thinking about?" I was like, "Lot's of things." She said,"You wanna talk about it?" I said, "It won't help." And she said, "Well tell me anyway." Daggone nosey family! Well I talked about it and she actually gave me the Word of the Lord. Amen. That helped me to be encouraged. Helped me repent (which means change your mind) and go into work with a different focus.

While I was in the car concentrating on all my problems, I realized where I'd started off wrong was that I didn't pray that morning nor did I read my Bible. Just a bad start off to my day. There's honestly a big difference. Plus after the Encounter last weekend I should have known better. You can't walk out the house without prayer. You need prayer to get through the day. To set the pace. God will cover you.

So I walk in and my other manager is already having a bad day. I was like we gotta change this. I went into the fitting room and I prayed. Actually my day started to get better after that.

Like the wind

Dude, this last week has been crazy. I knew because I was going to an Encounter last weekend and craziness always comes before and after the Encounter that I was in for something. Two cars stopped on me last week. Lots of confrontation. Working crazy hours. Oh but that's life and you deal with it.

Then that weekend I went to a music/worship Encounter. A big focus in my church are the Encounters and every single time they are life changing. We just learned more about what music was meant to do and what worship is all about. Just really sitting in God's presence was awesome. God inhabits your praise. When you praise, he's there. That's a wonderful thing to know.

THEN Sunday was just one of the best worship services. I got back to my seat and was still in his presence. It's a push to give more to God than what I been giving.

Work is about to be drastically different. I'm training for my promoted position this week. I'm just thinking about what I want to get out of this position. That's also bringing more out of me.

So really when I think about it, I can't be complacent. I have to give more in everything. That's a big responsibility. If I don't come up, then I'll just sit in mediocrity. I'm tired of being mediocre. It's time for excellence.

What did u say?

We will all be held accountable for the words we say. And its even more serious because once you say words, you cannot take them back. I've been saying a lot lately and the bottom line is: I should take my own advice. In most cases the advice is beyond me anyway. It's God speaking through me and its good advice.

One thing I asked for in prayer is that God would expose anything about me that is not like Him. That anything that would hinder my growth in God be brought to the forefront. Well, God does answer prayer.

Now, in my asking to be exposed there is the actual exposure part I have to deal with. It's often times embarrassing and very hard to go through it. But if you can admit that you're wrong for ever you've done and not try and cover it up, it usually means you want to change for the better. Some people are caught red handed in their mess and still deny they ever did it. I want to change for the better.

I have seen some things that I didn't even realize I did. Some things I didn't realize I was still doing.

All I can do now is accept the responsibility..... and the consequences. Oh yes, there are consequences. With every lil bit of exposure, I risk losing a lot. But it's because of my own doing.

Then I have to forgive myself, because if I use all my time sulking and wallowing in my failures, I might miss my blessing. And I have to forgive others for anything I may be holding against them. If we don't forgive others, how can we expect to be forgiven? You know the funny thing is, it's pretty easy for me to forgive. Bitterness weighs me down and makes it too easy to be depressed. But I often go to the extreme with my head in the clouds and forget other things too that set me up for the fall.

During my purity graduation, the prophet told me I know how to keep God's secrets and He has entrusted me with much. That's an awesome responsibility. It can also seem overwhelming if I let it. But the flip side of that is, I've fallen off from keeping other secrets. I had this thing like word vomit and sometimes when I tell myself to keep something, I end up telling. Not everything, trust, but usually its the very time I should keep my mouth shut.

The great thing about God is while I am being put out there is that He's a great and patient teacher. The God of a second, third, fourth, fifth to seventieth chance. With people sometimes we aren't as fortunate. What can we do? Deal with it.

So while I am being exposed and transparent. For the people who know me, they have a choice. They can cover me with prayer or choose to intensify my exposure. In his book Teach me how to love you, Thomas Weeks says, " If a man can love your weaknesses, he'll adore your strengths." I believe the same goes in family and friendships. Some peoples' weaknesses we just don't want to or have to deal with and that's a choice.

All I can do is take things as they are. Continuing to grow and change, hoping I don't run too many people off and learn from mistakes the first time I make them (not the fifteenth time like I usually do!).

Open the curtains

For the afternoon matinee, V for Vendetta. I'll tell y'all how that goes. I'm skeptical.

I figure for the rest of the week, I'll get some bon-bons and lay up in the bed, reading my book. Sounds good to me!


I was flipping channels and for some reason I stopped on BET NOW. Perhaps I shouldn't have been watching it, but I stopped just the same. So I was watching this video for that Shareefa girl called 'I need a boss'.

What's goin through my head is like this:

Hm, her haircut's different. Hot beat. Oh but she can't dance though. Now he know he ain't earn that money. She want somebody she can call Papi, Daddy? Uh, no. All that flashy stuff makes me nervous, looks real illegal.

Then Ludacris come out talkin bout he the 'king of all kings'. So what? You sayin you Jesus, Luda? That's the only King of kings I know. Then he go on to say, "I got more verses than the Bible". Oh let's just take the blasphemy to a whole nother level. The devil is bold these days!

That's when I knew I had to quit. I just can't do the whole secular thing and I'm bout to go repent right now.

No doubt

I finally finished Inside Man. Spike Lee is so off the chain. My favorite things about a Spike Lee joint are his signature shots. Now it's like you wait the whole movie just to see those shots. I could do without some of the language, but he always gets his point across.

Like every artist, he goes off the deep end sometimes. Like that scene in Girl 6 when all the phones are falling from the sky. Now that was really dumb.

Switching subjects, aren't there some people you hate to hear use slang because they just don't sound right? Even if they are young in age. Even if they are in that culture that created it.

Speaking of culture, one thing that bothers me is when a person completely forsakes their own culture for another. I am all for learning about other cultures. I love learning about traditions and different foods and languages, but I love my people. In no way am I excluding anyone, but if you don't have a close friend in your own culture it says something about you. I think its a form of self hatred. Just like when you confine yourself to dating someone of a race thats not your own. Again, I'm not saying you shouldn't date other races. I myself am open minded. I don't say I will only date black men. I love my black men. I am also open to someone of another culture coming into my life. One thing we must have in common though, no doubt, is Christ.

Man, I miss A Different World. There's no sitcom like it. Where they aren't afraid to get serious. Then come right back and make you laugh. A commentary on society today. Not just ignoring what's going on in the world for the sake of comedy.

Yes I am quite random. Thoughts stack on top of each other in my head, fighting their way to the surface. I try to stay on one stream of consciousness, but some times it doesn't work. Thomas Weeks says its because women must multi-task to run a home that it seems we have different personalities. Women have personalities, men have issues. And your man must have as many issues as you have personalities in order to know when to switch it up. Otherwise, he won't know how to handle that woman. Great book people. Pick that one up.

The Scenery!

My first day on hiatus from work. Bout to get started on cleaning out the closet. My sister called herself cleaning my room, but her cleaning is very deceptive. You go into the room and it looks spotless. Then you go the closet and there's everything you didn't see. I appreciate the initial work though. One less thing for me to do.

I'm reading Teach me how to love you by Thomas Weeks III. Last night I woke up in the middle of the night and just kept reading. I can tell its gonna be a great book already. Full of wisdom and realness.

I saw this movie I really enjoyed this morning called What a Way to Go with Shirley McClaine. This lady get married 4 times and each time they start out in love but eventually her husband gets incredibly rich and dies in some freak accident. It would have been pretty sad if it weren't funny. In the end she's got like a $100 mil and living on a farm with a failure of a husband. Just the way she'd always dreamed.

Sanaa Lathan is on Nip/Tuck now. I might have to check that out.

On the first day of my hiatus, I'm clearing out my head. Hopefully not filling it up with too much junk. I am catching up on my television though. What I have found is that there's nothing on TV.

I cleaned and then I got sucked into this internet. As soon as I check myspace I'm gettin off this thing.

Praise God

Who didn't think the devil would show up in worship practice? MAN, people trespassin, taking spots and positions they shouldn't be taking. But that's ok. All we gotta do is worship the Lord. Sing to the Lord. Be filled with His presence and he'll give peace. That's all we gotta do is worship. Easy right? Not so much.

What shoulda happened is someone should have gone to that person and had a one on one with them. A lot of us saw the division. Some were ignorant to the fact it was going on. It was not nice. I was simply trying to learn the song, my part, and go home so I could sleep. But we can't let people hinder the effectiveness of the team. We gotta let God lead. It's not just about singing. And y'all this is just the first practice. It's not gonna happen again. Glad it happened early.

Either the person who feels trespassed against will have to go to that other person or I'ma tell them, "Get out what you got to say or get over it." And I'm not talkin bout that fake 'I'm over it' and still be talkin bout it to everyone. For real, forgive. We are worship leaders. If we can't enter into His presence, how can we expect everyone else to go there?

The Bible says Matthew 18:15:

If your brother sins against you, go and show him his fault, just between the two of you. If he listens to you, you have won your brother over.

Then later in that same chapter:

21Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, "Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?"
22Jesus answered, "I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.


But other than that, it was awesome. I love the songs! I'm feeling more confident in being a soprano. I told Nicole I blamed her for being in the soprano section. She said, "If you're gonna blame me, blame Jesus too." Grrrr Cole. How do you come back at that? Good one. You got me kid.

Our first time leading worship is gonna be next Friday at 7pm. Come on down to Greenwood Christian Center if you're in the area.

So I was facebooking, which led to myspace and it led me here.

I was lookin at this dude's myspace page and stumbled across his favorite movies.

Scarface, Boyz N Da Hood, State Property I &; II, The Mack, The Notebook, Bad Boys II, South Central, Friday, Above the Rim, I cant remember them all, I gets high homie.

So funny! I'm not saying dudes shouldn't like The Notebook. I think its the greatest movie ever. And some dudes are in denial about the movie *ahem*. Just kinda seemed outta place here. Caught me a lil off guard.